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Spotlight Effect - do people really care about you as much as you do.
This might shock you and I’m not sure how to tell you this but you are not the center of the universe. At least not in the eyes of others around you. Quite a few studies have shown that people assume their features and behaviors are more salient to others than what they generally are.
This has a name, the Spotlight effect, and is the tendency to believe that other people are paying closer attention to one’s appearance and behavior than they really are.
Let’s say you drop a glass in a restaurant everybody gets quiet, glances over in your direction, then goes back to what they were doing before. For you though, this “embarrassment” lasts longer than a few fleeting moments and for some people this might ruin a perfectly good meal. But what about the others around you? Do you think the guy 2 tables over later that evening comes home and shares how some uncoordinated person dropped a glass on the floor?
It goes beyond just standing out though, let’s say you mess up slightly in a presentation. While you notice these things and they seem like a big deal oftentimes the others around us are oblivious.
You ask them, “did you notice the screw up I had in the presentation?”
They respond “You had a presentation?”.
See they didn’t even notice you were in the front of the room, so stop worrying about what others think and get out there and do some amazing stuff. All kidding aside…
Let’s Talk a Little Science
Thomas Gilovich, PhD, Victoria Husted Medvec, PhD, and Kenneth Savitsky, PhD, are the psychologists who coined the term the spotlight effect, in addition they devised numerous ways to measure it.
In one experiment, they had college students enter a room with other students while wearing an “embarrassing” Barry Manilow T-shirt. When the mortified (I didn’t know Barry Manilow was such a scary guy) students were asked to guess how many people in the room would remember the face on their T-shirt, they gave a number about twice as high as the number of students who actually remembered the shirt.
Other studies support what this one suggested: The spotlight effect makes most of us assume we’re getting about twice as much attention as we actually are. When Lincoln said, “The world will little note nor long remember what we say here,” he was wrong—but only because he was president of the United States. If you are currently the President, rest assured that millions will note and long remember if, say, you barf on the prime minister of Japan. However, if you are not president, you’re probably pointlessly blinded by the glare of imaginary social judgments.
So Now That You Know We Aren’t Watching You, What Should You Do About It?
Taking advantage of the spotlight effect can be powerful. Instead of focusing on what to you seems the issue focus on what you accomplished. This spotlight is typically just inside your mind and your own world. While constructive criticism is good also remember that if you are confident about your subject and about what you do that this will exceed any outward appearance.
In the book Bag the Eelephant by Steve Kaplan he shares a story about when he was giving a presentation to a candy company he was looking to land as a client. The clients came in the conference room with coffee, bagels and sat down to view his plan. The first thing he had to share a new logo design for their product The Big Pass. He flipped off the lights, turned on the projector and in big red letters… The Big Ass.
The burning the midnight oil he spent the night before had shown through. Not only was this mistake on the main slide but it embedded throughout the template. The best part is he didn’t let this faze him. He cracked a quick joke and moved past it and ultimately Steve was able to land the account. The client later told him that part of the reason was the were impressed we weren’t distracted by the screw up.
So next time you put something out there that isn’t all that perfect or have a “screw up” that is a bigger deal that it really should be immediately remember the spotlight effect.
